In the darling 1989 film, When Harry Met Sally, stars Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan raised the important question: can men and women really just be friends? Is is possible for two members of the opposite sex to have a platonic relationship without wanting to sleep with one another? In the beginning of the movie, Billy Crystal’s character Harry says, “No man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.” Even the women men initially aren't attracted to will eventually be attractive enough for a guy to want to sleep with them. Thus proving the notion that the only thing a man wants from a woman is sex. In the film, Harry turns out to be right. Because he eventually succumbs to his mannish nature and he and Sally have a midnight tryst. Their relationship soon crumbles and they realize they cannot be friends. Now that sex is in the equation everything has changed. But luckily from them by sleeping with one another, Harry and Sally open the door to their true feelings. They’re in love. In the end these two pals do get together as lovers. And in the final scene they divulge to us that they are now gleefully married. A real happy ending for two best friends.
What do I have to say to all of this? Duh! There is no better partner in life than your friend! For those who aren’t lucky enough to find their soul mate while on their dorm room floor or while shopping at their local supermarket or maybe bumping each other across Ayala Avenue, the world of dating can be a complete and utter nightmare. When looking for a person you want to spend the rest of your life with you want someone who is compatible. Someone who gets you. Someone you can rely on. Many people say their partner is their best friend and I love that. Because relationships are about more than just sex (though that’s one of the major bonuses!). Relationships are about sharing pivotal moments in your life with someone you care about. They’re about having someone who can be there for you when things are bad. And when they’re good. You want someone you can be yourself with. Someone who won’t judge you. Someone who makes you a better person. Now do these things sounds like that traits you look for in someone else? Of course, it does. That’s because these are also all attributes of a good friend.
Everyone wants their lover to be their best friend. So why not reverse it and make your bestfriend your lover? No one knows you better than a friend. Plus, you already know that the two of you get along great and that when you’re together you have fun. That’s what life should be about: enjoying things. Sure, you might find a partner who is sexy and one you have amazing chemistry with. Behind bedroom doors, it’s wild and steamy. But what happens when you leave the bedroom? Is this a person you can carry a conversation with? Is this a person you want to talk about your day to? About the promotion you didn’t get? Or about the fantastic meal you had at lunch? If so, then great! You are one of the lucky ones. But if not, is the sex really worth not being fulfilled in other ways? Probably not. Maybe if you’re in your twenties. But even that sets you up for a lifetime of chasing the wrong things. If you learn early what the important things are then you can use these lessons for the rest of your existence.
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