The Things to Do Before "I Do": the Toughest Parts About Wedding Planning

The Things to Do Before "I Do": the Toughest Parts About Wedding Planning
Image: Rocsana Nicoleta Gurza/pexels.com

The moments leading up to “I do” can be incredibly time-consuming and stressful. Sometimes we feel we need to endure the hardships of preparing for the big day, but this can also mean that by the time your wedding arrives, you are running on pure adrenaline. It's important to recognize that ultimately, it's about the two of you, and nothing else should matter, but you've got to be aware that wedding planning is a lot of time, preparation, admin, and a to-do list that's never been so long. Here are a few things to consider when it comes to planning, so you know exactly how to make the most of the things to do before “I do.”

Getting the Wedding Party Right
We can think that the wedding party is the bit where everybody lets their hair down and has more than their fair share of drinks, but the toughest thing about the wedding party is that from the perspective of the bride or groom if you see people sitting around not making the most of the music or enjoying themselves, that there's some sort of mismatch at play here. We need to create an ambiance that is perfect for partying, which is why music is so important. 

Ultimately, you want to pick things that matter to you, but you are also working with the guests' general music tastes, but also you're trying to get a party started. There are DJs such as Spinning Disc Wedding Entertainment, who work with you to create the ideal environment with the perfect setlist, and it's worth having a good idea of what you want to achieve first. The wedding party can almost be an afterthought, or some people focus more on this than they do the actual wedding, and it's easy to see why from both perspectives. Create the perfect ambiance, and you won't go far wrong.

The Decision-Making
There are so many decisions, big and small, that you need to make, so where do you draw the line? From the small details to the most significant choices, you can invariably feel stress because of a wealth of options. You end up thinking that you've made one decision but change your mind a few days later or when it's too close to the ceremony that you can't backpedal now. This is why before you start calling wedding planners or booking the venue, you both need to sit down and have a proper discussion about what you want out of the day. 

It is, ultimately, a day, and yes, it's one of the most important days of your life, but we have to make peace with the fact that not everything will go right. This is why people venture into bridezilla territory because they want complete control over every minuscule thing. Things will go wrong, and if you think one small thing going off course is going to ruin your big day forever, you might want to take a step back and have a bit more perspective. There are a lot of decisions to make, but it's far better for you to focus on the bigger things because the bigger things have a larger effect on the day itself.

The Pressures to Look and Feel Your Best
Something that's not necessarily discussed in relation to wedding planning, but you either need to be the blushing bride that outshines everybody in the room or indeed the country for that moment in time, or a groom that is perfectly sculpted can cause a lot of undue pressure. There are many people who've looked back on their wedding photos and thought they could have done more to look their best; however, we have to look at our weddings as a snapshot in time as much as it is the big day itself. 

What we have to remember is if we are trying to get some sort of exercise plan to look our best in the lead-up to the big day we don't create unhealthy habits in the process. We can easily feel stressed and overwhelmed because of other things, and if we have this overriding anxiety that we don't look perfect, then this is going to color our entire attitude to the day itself, but it's going to linger for a lot longer afterward. It's about making sure that we don't strive for perfection, but ultimately do the best we can without placing extra pressure on ourselves.

Family Dynamics
If we think more about the guests than we do ourselves, we've got to get a better handle on our priorities. Balancing the expectations and the opinions of both families, especially when there are conflicting ideas, can create a lot of stress. This does relate to our overall attitudes in wanting to have authority over the big day. 

If there are too many people looking to wedge their ideas in, you may want to ask yourself if you end up having the big day you want or the big day they want! This is why so many people elope. You may benefit from doing this because you can have the wedding you want where it is the two of you, but also you can benefit from having a wedding party afterward, which can take a lot of the pressure out of the situation.

There are a lot of things to consider when it comes to saying "I do," because while you may be on the hunt for the perfect wedding dress or venue, it should ultimately feel effortless because it's building up to a moment where the two of you are confirming your love for each other. Of course, these days weddings aren't held in the same regard as they were a few decades ago, but if you feel this is the right thing, you've got to be more than aware of the impacts it can have on you, so work on making it as stress-free and effortless as possible. This isn't always feasible because there's going to be some form of compromise here and there, but if you have an understanding of the tough bits, you can be better prepared.

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